Emotional Development in Children

 

Adults find it difficult to see children upset. They worry that listening to and naming strong feelings will escalate the problem. On the contrary, when a child senses that the adult really understands what he or she is experiencing, the child is deeply reassured, the relationship is strengthened, and the child learns that feelings are a normal part of life. 

6 Steps to Conflict Resolution

Step 1

Approach calmly, stopping any hurtful actions.

 -Breathe!

Step 2

Acknowledge children’s feelings.

-You look really upset...

Step 3

Gather information

-“What’s the problem?”

Step 4

Restate problem

-“So the problem is ...”

Step 5

Ask for ideas for solutions and choose one together

  • “What can we do to solve this problem?”
  • Encourage children to think of a solution. 

Step 6

Give follow-up support as needed 

 

Teach calming strategies after the conflict, not during.

-take 10 deep breaths

-count to ten

-move, exercise (go for a walk, stretch, yoga pose)

-drink a glass of water

-imagine a calm place or a happy place

 

Balloon breathing 

1.Think of your belly as a balloon

2.Put your hand on your belly o feel it rise and fall. 

3.Take a deep breathe in through your nose to fill your balloon

4.Hold your breathe for 2 seconds

5.Breathe out through your mouth slowly to deflate your balloon

6.Repeat balloon breaking 5 times. 

 

They are learning the ability to:

-Listen to others

-Discuss the details of problems 

-Recognize that when there is a problem, there are lots of possibilities for solutions.

-To express strong emotions in non hurting ways.

-To appreciate one’s own views, but also the views of others. 

-Deliberate, negotiate, and collaborate with others. 

-Stay Calm when confronted with a conflict or a problem.

 

De-escalating Conflicts

Turn to De-escalating conflicts:

-Use “I’ statements

-Use gentle body language

-Are specific

-Focus on present and future

-Focus on problem

-Focus on children’s needs and interests

-Listen carefully to the issue 

 

Balloon breathing 

1.Think of your belly as a balloon

2.Put your hand on your belly o feel it rise and fall. 

3.Take a deep breathe in through your nose to fill your balloon

4.Hold your breathe for 2 seconds

5.Breathe out through your mouth slowly to deflate your balloon

6.Repeat balloon breaking 5 times. 

 

D. Gartrell & M. King, The Power of Guidance: Teaching Social-Emotional Skills in Early Childhood Classrooms, NAEYC, 2004